Natalie, individual cats are as different as individual people. Some are lovers and snuggles. Others not so much.
I've always believed that pets pick us, not the other way around. My suggestion would be to wait until you are ready for another cat. It's okay if you never get to that point. If/when you are ready go to the shelter and just hang out with the cats. If the one that is meant to be with you is there it will approach you. It might take more than one visit. Just hang out and wait.
Please understand that cats have their own individual styles of showing affection. I have six who show affection in very different ways. I hand raised Mikey. He thinks I'm his mom. If he wants to snuggle he does not care if someone else is in my lap. He lays on top of them. Ollie, on the other hand, will come to me, rub his head on me, gets some scritches and be gone.