So I got a new job— it’s working in a retail pharmacy, which I hadn’t planned on doing, but I’ve done it before and last time I worked in one, it wasn’t too bad. Also, the team seems really nice and the pharmacy manager really jumped through hoops to get me a good pay rate. I start on the 19th, which is a relief, because working at my current job is really wreaking havoc on my mental and physical wellbeing. I put up my fall decor today— not that it’s terrible fall-y out here. It’s hot and bright and sunny and I absolutely hate it. Global warming and climate change seriously depress me, but I’m looking into ways to help the cause, because it matters a lot to me and I would rather do something than sit and wallow in despair. I was watching a 90s movie the other night and I felt so depressed because I miss those days— everything just seemed a lot simpler then. People didn’t seem to hate each other on sight or to the extent that they do now. I have to stop and remind myself that the 90s weren’t perfect for me though— I got bullied a lot (although I also bullied other kids, to be completely honest), my dad whom I adored and idolized was never around, my mom was a cesspit of resentment and anger because my dad was never around, and the death of my grandmother really ****ed me up. I guess no time is perfect. I just wish things weren’t such a mess these days. I want it to cool down outside. I want to be able to pay my bills. I want people to mind their own business. I am thinking I will move within the next year— maybe to western PA, which is where I was born and where I lived for a little bit as a kid. Or to KS. I don’t know yet.

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