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Mulder00, thanks for the update. When I read your initial post I honestly felt you were in a relationship with a controlling narcissist. Glad you finally realized that and finally recognize how you were brainwashed to feel guilt if he was not happy.
Please keep moving forward and pay attention to your guilt because you do not want him pulling you back into an unhealthy mindset again. Narcissistic individuals are all about control and needing their ego serviced. They can really consume their partners in its an “all about me” relationship.