I was on ftm (female to male) Reddit last night and it was mostly people worrying about their weight issues and insurance issues. I worry about not fitting into the LGBTQ community. I am what they these people call a "twink" a skinny dude. These people seemed almost angry at the skinny trans guys. I've also not dealt with trouble getting my surgerys covered and I have my families support. I just am not sure what it will be like if I were to go to one of these support groups. I was in a treatment center in 2010 and most of the kids were wards of the states. I got treated very badly by both the staff and the kids because I came from such a different background. The staff expected me to be perfect 100% of the time and when I messed up they became abusive. The kids were jealous that I had what they never had and were mean. I just like wonder if its even worth it as an adult or if I should just start working and keep to myself and my family. I know one trans guy on my facebook but he doesn't seem interested in talking to me much and I know he hasn't had the same expirences I've had. So I feel like he resents me a bit. I've tried starting a conversation with him a couple times but it goes nowhere.

I'm feeling suprisinly good otherwise today. I think its because I didn't wake up at 11PM and its day 2 of not inhaling tons of tic tacs and other mints. I had a couple Ensures and a couple yogurts and I had a Diet Coke but no coffee or Mountain Dew. I got to the library when they opened and got a few books. My family is coming over for my brothers birthday so my mom got the makings for sandwhiches. My stomach has stayed calm, so far all I've needed is half a zofran. I didn't have any apple sauce either and I'm wondering if that has been causing issues. Hopefully I'll know in a couple weeks.

My sister and my nephews are here but my brother in law had to run some errand. Honestly he has been acting so frazzled lately. The last time I saw someone I was close to acting so incredibly out of character was when my ex uncle was having an affair with his personal trainor. I highly doubt anything like that is going on with my brother in law, but he has been acting very odd lately.