Quote:
Originally Posted by *Beth*
I also define rupture that way, for myself.
My therapist and I had a rupture in June. She really did take full responsibility for it, which I appreciated. I thought I felt a resolution, but lately the haunting feeling of the rupture has returned. I'm finding myself stuck with regard to overcoming the feeling of betrayal - even though I do believe that I had a very minor role in it (it was primarily on her, however).
I am planning to speak with her in today's session, but I'm finding it difficult to truly feel that the rupture is resolved and that I can trust her as I did prior - even though she has "owned" it.
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I hope the session goes well, Beth. It's encouraging that she's "owned" it. I know what you mean about having trouble trusting that a rupture is resolved. I've found that I can *think* it's resolved, then a month or two later, I am hesitant to bring up a certain topic or request with my T for fear of how he'll respond. So then I realize that I need to talk about it more.
I've had a couple ruptures with my T this summer, and it feels OK now, but I also feel I'm treading a bit more carefully with him. He seems to be acting more carefully with me as well.
For me a rupture is something that threatens the relationship, particularly my ability to trust and feel safe with the therapist. It usually involves something from my past being triggered, too, or just an area that's a particularly sensitive place for me, an insecurity or area of self-doubt or self-loathing.