I think you have to ask yourself what it means to show he whole you to everyone. I believe we really ARE different people in different settings. I am my children's mother - they do not need to see my depression or know my history. I am the boss at work - again, I keep my angst under wraps as well as I can. With some of my friends, I'm more open, vulnerable and sad...with others, I'm a complete smart-*****, the one with the funny stories, etc. The whole me means there are different parts of me - and I'm only going to let a very few people see all the different parts.

The idea of being authentic without full disclosure is one I've struggled with a lot. I was truely not seen as a child and now I'm really good at hiding in plain sight. But I've come to realize that I can be authentic and appropriate. It isn't wise to trust everyone with everything. My goal is to trust a few people with the scary stuff.

That said...in therapy, I think you show the parts of you that you've been unable to show out in the world. (otherwise, why go to therapy?) But this takes trust and guts - a mixture I think. I jumped around with therapists for a little while trying to find the "right one." I finally figured out that I wasn't staying long enough to know if they were right. So I committed to the process and struggled with the relationship. I've now been in therapy for 5 years with the same therapist. I don't believe he knows everything because I still don't know myself completely, but we are getting there.

Good luck with this. It feels awful to feel unknown, even if you know you are the one hiding yourself.