So, I've ended things with him, & we slept in separate bedrooms. Yes, and before my father's service. It could not be helped. All was coming to a head and I had to do this for myself. My mother does not need to know any of this until after the service. I told her he is probably not coming because he is "not feeling well".

And I told him last night that I am not comfortable having him come to the service, so I asked him not to come. I also told him I cannot trust him, I cannot live this way and that the fighting for an entire month and the insults did me in. I told him he broke yet another promise to me, and therefore, the trust is now completely gone.

He was supposed to be rebuilding the trust. And he claimed that he made a Covenant with God to always treat me with respect and love. He also made a Covenant with God to never step out of the marriage again.

So, he breaks his promise to always treat me with love and respect, and all I can think is - what other promises will you break in the marriage? If you can break one, you can certainly break another, as you have done in the past. There is no trust anymore. He has shattered that. I cannot trust what he says - period.

So, I told him all of this last night and told him I have made up my mind. We're done. He's been begging and pleading with me, saying we can go to to a new therapist if this one is no good. And he begged for me to cuddle with him this morning - I refused. I am standing firm and I am standing strong in my stance.

He also makes things up - he recently tried to tell me that I had wanted him to come home from his friend's house because I missed him or didn't want him there. This was completely made up! I never did such a thing, and I know I never would have done such a thing. He LIES and makes up his own version of reality!

I have to say that I feel relieved this morning. The burden has been lifted. I cannot live in misery, I cannot live mistrusting my husband all the time, and I am choosing to live in peace and happiness instead.

That feels good - to take control of my life and to head in a direction that is far healthier. This feels very right for me. I know it's not going to be easy, but I'd rather be happy and single then miserable and mistrusting my husband.