I've never been married so I couldn't offer much to say that could be helpful. But I will speak for myself about this. The only thing I can say is that I've let a friend back in (seemingly several times in the past) after I told him I don't want to continue being friends. But after a breakup he calls and cries (yes that's right; an old man crying when he leaves me a message on my voicemail). I feel sorry for him because, other than his wife, he doesn't have many friends. He had friends in the past but they abandoned him when his health went downhill. And at the same time I feel kind of sorry for myself because I don't have much going for me socially. So I tell him how I feel and then he's apologetic. But after a while, the crap comes back again. So it goes on all over again.

I guess we both have soft hearts.