To put this in context I’m not bothered too much by lies in a situation whereby a person lying is an acquaintance or colleague, I find it irksome but that’s all.

If however it becomes apparent someone I really like, or who is close to me, has been lying I react quite emotionally. I feel insulted, think less of them and don’t trust them. Not horrendous life changing lies, fairly small unimportant ones. I just really don’t like lying.

Apparently everyone lies to some extent, I understand that, and I understand that white lies are sometimes necessary (like “I love the gift you gave me” when you don’t) but the other type of lying, about the circumstances of something/the truth of a situation - I react badly to those. Especially hard for me is when the person obfuscates or further lies when it’s clear what has happened in order to try to cover up. Like I’m expected to play along with them in order to avoid confrontation. I feel super awkward and it changes my opinion of them.

I don’t feel the same about a person again after this, they feel untrustworthy to me. Then I read online “everyone lies” that I need to adjust my expectations and I think “Well I really try not to lie myself” honesty and openness are important to me. I may hold back from sharing my opinion if I feel it’s not appropriate but I wouldn’t lie, I just would keep quiet.

Does anyone have any thoughts? Do others forgive lying easier than myself? How do you do this?