Yeah lots to think about here thanks, I’m glad I’m not alone in struggling with this.

It’s interesting a few people mention morality, I am a ‘straight up’ person, my husband described me as such today but I don’t think I’m morally superior - I certainly know how to lie and I did definitely do it in childhood/adolescence. As I grew into adulthood I came to strongly believe lies were best avoided, as they not only lead to all kinds of trouble but they stopped me making a true connection with others. That was my own personal journey.

So if someone lies to me, I feel something shut down between us, the connection is harmed.

I do feel conflicted, like I should be more compassionate, but idk maybe I’m right to be wary. It is similar to gaslighting in that lies cast doubt, and I feel like I’m second guessing a persons words and actions thereafter.

Oh and I agree @Yaowen you aren’t often wrong in my experience and in any case these are your thoughts and as such neither wrong nor right.

Puppy toilet training these days is positive reward not punishment (we have a family member with a new puppy!) but maybe that doesn’t detract from what you’re saying re human behaviour.