There have been some oddities happening at my home: Pounding on doors after dark, door bell ringing, door knobs tried, deck furniture moved in the middle of the night, packages disappearing and reappearing opened on the door step, trash cans knocked over, mail torn up and placed on my bench, car broken into and seats reclined (and that’s all), a used latex glove found and then the fun stuff: cigarette butts outside my window and the screen removed. It’s been a slow drip of events over months since brother passed.

I can attest that I am highly intelligent as long as the planets align just right (and only then) but there’s some part of me that refused to acknowledge that this was no silly prank or someone looking to rob us but a sick game that I don’t have the rule book for that could potentially escalate. I’ve lost valuable time and evidence with my head in the sand. I’ve compartmentalized it so much that I told nobody - not you who I usually come to first. And not S. And most importantly not the police. I can’t say why. When I saw those car seats yesterday though the light came on. Someone is targeting me or us - and not to play cards.

Until I can get full security measures in here which will happen ASAP, I’m going to get bear spray and a baseball bat. It’s not safe for me to have heavier protection due to my depression and past actions. I’m going to file a police report tonight and I’ve let the people in my life know. I am trying to shield mom for almost all of this. I am okay. I am calm and cracking jokes like usual. S is very angry, deeply concerned and upset that I took this on alone for so long. I can understand that. Mea culpa. He believes that the best course of action is for him to move in for awhile. Idk about that right now but for tonight S and his German Shepherd are staying the night. Hopefully, we’ll get to the bottom of it soon. I still have a hard time believing this is really happening.