How utterly, utterly heartbreaking. I can't even imagine what you must be going through. Wish I knew what to say that would help. My mother is in her 90s and I fear and dread the future. Please feel free to lean on us for support during these unhappy and heartbreaking times. Hopefully others here with more understanding and wisdom will see your post and respond to it with more helpful words than my poor words. So very, very sorry I don't know how to be helpful to you!