I realise now that I'm the worst friend and totally selfish. I had an inkling that I wasn't as nice a person as I thought and now I know for sure. I'm judgemental and closed off and self absorbed. I am upset that you have cancelled the session even though you're sick. All I can think about is my own ****** needs and no one else's. And by saying all this I'm falling into a wounded victim which is even more unpleasant and I just hate myself. No wonder I have hardly any friends. You think a lot more of me than I am worth. I don't know how to do better. I honestly don't have a clue. I want to be there for others but somehow I never get it right. I always fall short. Others seem to know and have this natural altruism, I'm just a complete f up of a person.