S arrives this morning before 9. I’m very happy about that. We’ve decided to really go off the grid for a few days so I may not be posting until I get home next week - no cell phone. We’re going to hike, play some pool, enjoy each other’s company and do whatever else we get up to. He’s used to doing the touristy stuff in the concrete jungle part of this place. That misses the whole point. We will at least go to the aquarium, which is quite nice. Petting the sting rays (pure velvet) is lovely.

I am used to doing things like going deep into the woods in summer after dark when it is pitch black and watching the fireflies all around you like some magical realm come to life. You can’t buy things like that or any of the other things I’ve been doing. It’s important to collect soul stirring experiences and not just things. My humble opinion only.

I’ve had a wonderful time up to this point. Incredible. Ready to address life again. My meltdown the other day had to do with my daughter. I love her very much but I can not have a relationship with her under current conditions. My DBT therapist validated and verified that I’ve gone above and beyond to fix it and that I can’t allow myself to be treated that way any longer. I hope some day to have a good relationship with my daughter but that time is not now. That causes me much pain but so did death by a thousand cuts. I’ve left it with my higher power for a miracle.

I hope everyone has a peaceful day and peaceful weekend. Much love.