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Old Oct 13, 2022, 07:05 AM
RollercoasterLover RollercoasterLover is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2021
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 315
Hopefully when he moves out, you will be able to maintain no contact. In my experience, low or minimal contact isn't enough. Unfortunately, since I have children, I have to have some contact with a narcissist. My therapist helped me set extremely firm boundries (aka the rules of contact).

There were certain behaviors like name calling that were problematic. I made a rule that we could only use our actual names when speaking to one another about anything or talking about one another in front of our children (your father/mother was ok for use when talking to the kids). I know he called me a bunch of different names in front of other adults. His sister actually called him out on that in public and told him I was a better person than he was because I never called him anything but his first name or family name (like Joseph/Joe or JP).

If a boundry was crossed, I shut it all down completely and told him all contact needed to be done with a mediator (free service in my county). He hated going to mediation meetings because they were documented for the court which benefitted me and not him.

It's worth trying to set some rules of contact. The worst that can happen is it doesn't work and things stay the way they are for a few weeks. All the best to you. I hope you are focusing on self care and finding happiness.
Hugs from:
Bill3, Have Hope
Thanks for this!
Bill3, Have Hope