I'm sorry, that sucks. I had a hard time the one time I saw awesome T's wife at the office (I couldn't go in until I knew she had left the parking lot). T was very upfront about it being his wife and was OK listening to my discomfort. I am sorry that L could not offer that to you. I know there are risks to self-disclosure but you had already seen him being coy certainly is not going to help things.