Loss can often result in medical depression.

There is some medical research that links excessive exposure to stress hormones to damage to parts of the brain: the hippocampi, the amygdalae and other regions.

The damage is sometimes linked to atrophy of these and other regions.

Such profound changes in brain anatomy and physiology can affect mood, motivation and contribute to a person saying and doing things that normally they would not say or do.

A visit to a licensed physician might be helpful to you.

Please do not beat yourself up mentally over things that might be caused by your suffering brain.

Are you in the care of a physician and/or psychotherapist?

Divorce can be hard on the brain. I think it can help if we are especially kind of compassionate to our brains when they are suffering. Beating them up when they are already hurt doesn't really prove helpful, at least in my experience.

I wish I knew what to say to help you. Hopefully others here will see your post today and will respond with helpful ideas.

A hurt animal might lash out at others in its pain. A hurt animal like a pet might even snap at loved ones. The compassion we feel for hurt animals is something we owe ourselves when we are hurt. If we are compassionate people, we cannot really exclude ourselves from compassion when we are hurt. What do you think?

So sorry that all these unhappy things are happening to you. It is heartbreaking.