Yes, I am always worried about asking for too much or being needy: with L and J.

With J I worry because she said that she doesn't put in a fraction of looking for care for her clients when she's on vacation. To me, I feel like she must see me as a burden because I was texting her everyday at all times of the day. I checked in with her about it, and she says I'm not a burden and she does not regret being a support for me.

I email L daily. Sometimes multiple times a day. And sometimes phone calls as well. I worry one day she will tell me no more or will punish me by taking away out-of-session support. But she reassures me that will not be the case. That she only offers what she can offer. And that our commitments and rituals and agreements work for us.

L says everyone is needy. She says we all can be a "fussy baby" at times. And people who consider others as a burden actually don't have their own good boundaries.