When you have kids, prospective partners must understand this is not a one person deal, but a package offering. If they care for one, they must care for all. There's no picking and choosing. That's a consideration and responsibility that anyone willing to be with you must take seriously and never think events can or should change that. If they can't be all in, then they really need to be out. Your kids will always be in your life and need you. A stable support structure is critical to that bond. Don't let anyone fowl that nest.