It is like picking at a scab. You know it is unhelpful, but you can't stop yourself from doing it. I have a way of ruminating upon things that cause me to get aggressive. For example, arguments I had many years ago, or difficult situations. I have spoken to my therapist about this previously.

She is very into Mindfulness and grounding yourself. Truthfully this doesn't work very well for me. Sometimes I go for a massage, but I still find myself replaying these old stressful situations in my head. It is like an old VHS cassette I replay them over and over again.

Even in a setting, like getting a table massage, I replay these situations. Sometimes it gets so bad that random people notice. I was at the grocery store and someone approached me to ask "hey, are you alright?"

Has anyone had a similar experience with rumination? What worked best for you? My therapist has a theory that this is my brains way of trying to make the situation better. In a way it is showing me how right I am about the whole difficult situation. I believe there may be a grain of truth to that, but it is making me feel lousy in the process.