I think you can all look at my past posts and see that at some point I began to be aware that the kids were seeing things, and it wasn't just my perceptions.

This is bad, because I've drawn the kids into things more. I honestly feel insane. My perceptions of things in our past and hers are so different.

Last night she wanted to address my lack of commitment to date nights. Pointing out that she broke plans often because she wasn't feeling well, because she connected with friends, because she had homework... None of that was true.

She said I had an abrupt and self-righteous tone when talking to her last night. I said, you're probably right and that isn't helping anything. I'm sorry. I'll change that. Since we are talking about tone though, can we talk about how angry you got on Thursday about the car, and the yelling and swearing? No. That never happened.

The re-telling of our past it just as bad. So I'm asking the kids about stuff because I feel crazy.

I'm looking at what divorce settlements are going to cost long term. I'm pretty low today.