Abusers use the same techniques used in POW camps.....brainwashing...I wrote a paper and presented it to my State's Counseling Association (no degree but a "lifetime "of abuse made me an expert.....entitled: Society's Hidden Pandemic ...Verbal Abuse, Precursor to Physical Assault, and a Form of Biochemical Assault. (I wrote that before the pandemic) Every time we are abused, the body releases cortisol and cortisol damages the immune system. I have always joked that it is a wonder I am not dead after a childhood of abuse, 31 year marriage of the same and then a church who abused me. I am very proud of you, you are fighting a war to try and keep your sanity. In the end you will have escaped.