So I'm depressed, sick, still no permanent home, and withdrawing I know it's temporary but it doesn't feel temporary I'm trying to focus on Christmas but that's not helping when a simple mistake makes you want to self harm. At least I'm not the only one making mistakes right now. H was really upset he made a mistake but it was fine. I wish I could let go of my mistakes as easily. 2 packages got lost in the mail today I'm so scared I'm not going to get them. It's 10 Christmas gifts. I know I should be focused on changing our situation but I feel defeated. I feel like saying all I want for Christmas is my meds but no it has to be stuff.