One thing with the "I'm fine" though, after T comes back, was, for me, that I was fine because T was back and I had "finished" with her having been gone! After a point one I realized I was "holding on" to bad feelings because they had been bad and there'd only been me to acknowledge them at that time and I wasn't yet feeling like I "counted" enough to be an authority on acknowledging my feelings! But after awhile I got tired of the whiplash of fine/not fine caused from holding on and then suddenly letting go (like a stretched rubber band) and it became much more comfortable to be miserable when I was miserable (when T was away) and okay when T was back and I had no need to feel abandoned anymore, because I no longer was for the moment!