Hi P, I am so sorry that you suffer with harm OCD. I have it to quite a degree and it is absolutely miserable. I can't even allow myself to describe the "harming" thoughts I have, for fear something bad will happen to loved ones. Is the Clomipramine helping you?
What a sheer hell you've been through...so much of your diagnosis has been disgustingly misunderstood. And the thing is, harm OCD is truly not uncommon! Many people with OCD have harm thoughts. Many, many years ago (I'm 59) I was in an OCD support group (long before the internet). There was a young woman in the group, truly one of the most gentle, soft-spoken people I have ever met. She was tormented by thoughts that she would harm her parents, who were people she loved very dearly.
All OCD is, as you most likely know, anxiety. I know that when I feel anxious (which is most of the time) I also tend to struggle more with "harm" fears.
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