In all of the chaos of the past day, I realized I haven't taken my meds, morning or night. I legitimately forgot to.

A day or so without meds is not the end of the world for me, but I did notice some traditional bipolar bipolar symptoms come to the surface. Scattered thoughts, a bit of anxiety beyond the norm, and pressure of speech that caused me to have trouble putting my thoughts into words. That might explain the modest sales for the past couple of days. I've got to be focused as much as I can be talkative to make the sale. I'd rather avoid the hypomanic or manic episode, so I made sure to get back into it, med wise.

The Social Security lawyers dropped my disability case as I met the income threshold with my new job. On the one hand, I absolutely make enough money to get by in my area, so I've got no real issue with that reasoning. I've got a small livelihood. My issue is, looking back on all of my academic and health and work issues over the years, what happens when the bottom gives out? Because it has a tendency to happen in my life.

Anybody familiar with the Sword of Damocles myth? A rich and powerful king sits on the throne with a sword hanging over his head by a hair, ready to break at a moment's notice. He has to be ever vigilant, always looking over his shoulder waiting for the thread, the hair to break and cause disaster.

I feel like I'm on that throne, just waiting for something to go wrong.