Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
It’s nice that you to go and enjoy the music for awhile.
Why would this woman buy you drinks? You’ve just met her. I wonder if she thought you accepting the drink entitled her to some touching.
I know you said these are all hippies and just spread the love. And it’s fine if it’s causing you comfort. But it’s just causing you stress. That couple driving you around, the guy who felt entitled to be your boyfriend, now this woman buying drinks and touching. There has to be some middle ground and some boundaries so you could be comfortable. Not so uncomfortable you have to leave or avoid venues
It seems like these people keep taking you under their wing (how weird, do they think grown woman can’t have a good time without someone taking care of her?) because people in general are uncomfortable seeing a woman alone. People are expected to be coupled. How stupid and outdated.
I was in some ridiculous situations when people questioned me being alone and insisted I must joined others. One time funeral director was up in arms that I was going to drive from funeral home to a cemetery in my own car and should i drive with some family. I spent 5 minutes trying to convince him that it’s inconvenient and unreasonable for me to leave my car behind riding with people. He was like but you are alone. It’s ok. It’s a funeral!!!!
One time someone questioned me why I was alone at Friday night service at a temple. Was I suppose to bring a date??? She wanted me to sit with them because I sat alone in a pew. This isn’t a dance party! I am entitled to sit alone.
Most people mean well. But overall our society still think of women as helpless creatures who can’t be places alone and must have someone accompany them. Or that women can’t enjoy their own company so they should never be alone. So everyone needs to jump in and save poor lonely woman. That’s literally my pet peeve
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I didn't ask her for a drink either - she turned to me, saw my bottle was empty and offered to get me one. She was touching me before that, too.
The hippie culture - it's a very community oriented culture, so people want to naturally include others. So I think it's a natural inclination within this culture to want to include a single woman who is out by herself. Sure, I can take care of myself, and I was initially fine being out alone. But, it was crowded, and two tall women butted in suddenly and stood right in front of me, taking my space, so this woman felt protective of me and wanted to help - she let me stand in front of her instead, and that's how I got adopted. by her group.
After a while, I felt like I had to be as bubbly and as happy and excited as she was. She kept talking to me, and laughing and I felt a lot more - well, let's just say reserved in my demeanor. I wanted to have a good time, but I was not on the same page as her. I had to leave that scene because the touching became uncomfortable after a while, and I was not feeling all that bubbly. I couldn't meet her at her level and it felt uncomfortable and like a big stretch for me to even try.
This will not stop me from going to concerts that I want to see. I am learning boundaries - and this woman kind of crossed my boundaries. Too much touching for my tastes, of someone you just met. That's not quite my style. I am more reserved than that. I am more conservative I think than I even know.