Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
It’s understandable to feel sad and lonely. But as about activities companions it’s so important for women to have other social connections such as hobby groups, girl friends and other social outlets. Just because you are married it doesn’t mean you can’t go out and hang out with other people and join various activities without your spouse. I find it healthier while married and certainly big help if you find yourself alone.
. I was in a relationship where I spent most of my free time with him mainly because he made it rather difficult for me to have my own life and I didn’t feel strong enough. I changed it all around after I left him and I’ll never live this way before. My husband is fully on board with it.
I don’t spend all my free time with my husband. Being attached to the hip is a dangerous place to be.
PS your husband wasn’t even a good companion at the concerts, he either wanted to leave early or wouldn’t get ready on time to go there or some women flirted with him at concerts. You can come and go as you please now and not worry
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Somehow, my husband managed to make me attached at the hip. From early on, he communicated to me that he missed me all the time when we were apart, and how much he needed me. Early on, I stopped seeing friends and doing my own activities. I became more isolated from a social life, or any kind of life without him, while being with him.
My world became HIM and centered around our relationship. Now that's gone, and I have a big gaping hole in my life.
I know the answer to the problem is to join social and activity groups and meet new people, and I will in time. Right now, I am just holding my head above water and am trying to live without him in my life. And I don't want to emotion dump on new people, and that's what I am afraid I would do if I joined groups right now. I need to talk about it, let it out and process it all, which I am doing with my closest girlfriends.
It's too bad my girlfriends all live out of state - so unfortunate. One girlfriend from Santa Fe, NM and I are talking about taking a cruise vacation together in Feb - that would be very fun for me.
I've lost myself, ultimately - and I need to get myself back.... and I may have been lost for years... I need to rediscover who I truly am and find ME again. This much I know.