I see your point of view as valid in my life too. I am 75 and in looking back, I still miss the time in childhood when thinking about things seemed simply black or white. As life got more complex, my brain had to learn how to deal with the "gray" by factoring in more points of views within the family, school and community---and now globally. Lacking confidence, and not wanting to admit it, caused me to try on various masks, fueled by bravado, in order to have a place within the group. Dangers are everywhere and way too confusing. What was/is missing is the continual need/development of autonomy: knowing my limits (owning and learning from them without blaming) has become my strengths. I am vulnerable: life can be wonderful and connecting at times, but can also be harsh, hard, complex and scary. Adult brain's have to deal with life as is and this doesn't get easier with aging. Adapt or die.

I've seen many old people in memory care facilities still cry out for their deceased mama and papa for nurturance...seems the need/dependency for most of us is our dependency upon the kind comfort of others, right to the end. That remembered feeling of dependency within my autonomy makes me more vulnerable and humane; more authentic because bravado is no longer needed as a motivation. Hope for today is THE daily decision I "get to" make while continually becoming true to myself within this world's complexity.