It's understandable that you'd like a relationship with a man, but you're right that you're not doing yourself any favors by obsessing over that. I suggest you get out where there will be appropriate men and meet some, maybe thinking about men as friends initially. That's what I had to push myself to do.

If you're interested in that guy from high school, then you can give him a chance, but move slowly. Perhaps he's matured over the years and is not as shallow as he was then.

And by all means, spend time with new female friends and with family. You don't want to come across as clingy and needy. Right? I've found that contrary to the thoughts of my old shy, scared self, most people don't bite.

Maybe even a new hobby or interest can help you spend your time and meet people with similar interests. (Or pick back up on an old hobby or interest.)

Okay?