Thank you both. You've put it all into perspective.

The only family member I've discussed this with is my aunt. She too cannot understand why her sister is behaving in this way. She made a very telling comment around this time last year. "Now I know it's not all you". This after a discussion about mother's behaviour. Actually, it was more me opening up.

My brother doesn't want to know. He believes everything he's told about me. Except maybe recently, when he's displayed a little impatience (if what my mother says is correct).

As for the carer statement, it would not be unpaid as I could claim UK carers benefit. No, even a monetary "reward" could not compensate for the loss of independence, self-esteem and general wellbeing. Too many women have done this and it hasn't ended well for them. And, we can't blame it all on Covid and lockdowns!