I am so appalled that i have, all during my life, acted EXACTLY as my mother did, mostly towards me, but at home in general. Loud, obnoxious, self-righteous, selfish, and always right. Or completely passively, like my dad. I was either the abuser or the abused. Most of my relatives (i have 60 first cousins, altho some have passed) see my mother as a saint and me as the horrible daughter. I feel like wtf she never allowed me to BE me. But there IS a me, unknown to her little mind, that i always was and am now beginning to manifest.

Im glad youre back.