See if this describes your relationship.

Added to this is her addiction to alcohol only further compromising your relationship.

From what you share, I believe you really want to have the home and picture of a happy family in the community you like so much. Yet, there comes a point where it’s time to face what is present in the relationship that is too unhealthy for that to happen.

I am borrowing this link from another member who posted it and when I listened to it your challenge came to my mind.