View Single Post
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,093 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
21.3k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Nov 26, 2022 at 12:39 PM
 
Narcissistic/Toxic individuals NEED chaos to survive. They are very comfortable with their lies and exaggerations because these things produce the needed chaos the get a feed from so they don’t get bored. They see different environments as theirs, a place where they can create drama and chaos to feed off of. They will even have a sense of ownership of a person, especially a person that reacts in a way that contributes to the chaos they need to feel alive.

Actually, once you learn how to listen, they tell on themselves all the time. Because they develop a possessive mindset they tend to think everything is about them personally. If you have a different opinion and others agree with you they believe they are being ganged up on. Oh no! They prefer to be the “director” and if they feel that is threatened they will come at you and even throw a tantrum.

You were able to enjoy a holiday. While you had to work at maintaining a calm, the presence that used to bring the chaos was absent. Ah yes, distance can be a friend.

Healing and growing is slowly learning how to identify these individuals that thrive on chaos and know why they are unhealthy for you. They are in family, work places and on line communities as well.

Given how we owned a restaurant with a sizable bar and live entertainment, I witnessed these type of individuals, often alcoholics that were regulars looking for chaos and claiming it to be THEIR hangout. Ugh the things I witnessed as these individuals consumed alcohol exposing their true selves was something. And individuals well into their 50s too. I was younger and was not much of a drinker.

Once you begin to recognize the behaviors and the affect it has on you, that begins the journey to slowly healing.
Open Eyes is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
Mendingmysoul