Hi- I'm reading this and for a moment I actually wondered if this was posted by my husband. You've basically said everything he accused me of when I found out about his affair. Meanwhile, in my mind I was doing everything I could to make him happy. I sensed he was unhappy and just thought if I did enough it would make him happy. As I've found out, none of what I THOUGHT was loving acts were received that way by him. So- just because you think right now she doesn't give a sh-- doesn't mean it is true. Before you wind up in our situation- as painful as it might be- try calmly discussing your feelings. I really wish he would have. All the time I spent doing the wrong things makes me sick to my stomach and she may very well feel the same