i have been trying to get out and meet people, and its very very hard...
they all seem to like me and they say "oh lets hang out lets exchange numbers"
but my paranoia inside makes me believe they are talking bad about me as i leave...
and my insecurities get in the way of converstaions, or relationships.
i met a really hot guy and i keep taunting myself that im too fat and that i have an ugly body, and that he'd be dissapointed if we ever hooked up....
and i want friends in real life, badly, but i know i will sabotage everything.
sucks when the sickness dominates all aspects of my life this way.