Abusers never take responsibility or ownership for their mistakes and contribution to the issues. They are never at fault and so they never apologize or own up to any mistakes. They also will take vulnerability in their partner and will use it as a weapon against you, just like she did with your health issues. You are to blame, in her mind.

I had a headache as a result of my abusive husband yelling and screaming at me. He told me my headache was my own fault and my own doing. No sympathy, no ownership, only blame.