I've had many ruptures with L in the 3+ years we've been together. Some are her crossing my boundaries, some are her accidentally triggering me or making a mistake, but most are misunderstandings. Both of us are responsible for our part of the rupture. No one is to blame. We always talk it out and work it out. Many times, we just need to tweak something we do.

Ruptures last for however long it takes to process it. It's not like you forget what happened, but you learn from it and move forward. Some of my ruptures lasted a month or so.

Going through ruptures are worth it if you think the relationship can survive it...if you want to survive it. But it takes both parties to be willing to work on it. L and I have a saying that we take the bricks thrown at us, and build our foundation instead of allowing it to break us. And it has worked. We are stronger now because of the difficulties we've been through.