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I often hear or read that we don't have to be the victims of our negative, fearful, and bad thoughts, but that we have control over such thoughts
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I think that's true to the extent that we can change, or try to change, our
responses to such thoughts in terms of different courses of action regarding them. In that sense you could say there is a level of
control over them. But in terms of making these thoughts 'go away' all together, well, that could take time. Time working on oneself in a process of self transformation. People also call it a process of healing.