I find myself scratching my head reading ,trying to understand.
Dear Applelime,I would say donot pay attention to what they said or did.Or why they said or did it.Pay attention to your feelings about all that. Nightmares,flashbacks and PTSD. You are the one needing therapy over this.Is it even worth talking to them?Think of all the damage they did to you.It has been toxic .Why do you want to drink poison so to figuratively speak?Or do you think if you keep on talking to them they will change and become nicer people?Do you think some how if you continue tobe nice,they will come around and treat you nice?Sounds like you want to fix them.Or want to analyze if they meet the criteria of covert narcs.Why do you waste your time on analyzing such awful people?Therapy will heal you and you don't need such damaging people in your life.No need to fix anyone other than you.Keep safe.