I think our thoughts are connected to our emotions and doing our best to “not feel”. I think many have been raised to not feel “don’t cry, don’t be angry, don’t be sad, don’t be scared etc”. That’s actually unhealthy as one tends to believe that feeling emotions is wrong and expressing them is wrong, even selfish.

In therapy we learn that is wrong and is at the root of our anxiety, depression, and low self esteem. And DBT is a therapy that focuses on naming emotions and what they mean and that they are normal. If the focus is on not feeling then one doesn’t know what emotions mean and that you are not bad or wrong if you experience different emotions. You can’t become emotionally intelligent if you avoid emotions.