Hi NP,
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you'd said you loved him! I just recalled the post you'd shared with him where you said you wished you could say that. And I'm sorry things shifted from it feeling nice and secure with him to your feeling unlovable.

And I get the desire for having him check in with you. My T has done that once, a few months ago--and it was really just to say "I know we left things on a difficult note. It's OK if you email me." But this part of me wished he would have done that after a difficult session last week, to reassure me. But of course he didn't, because it's not a thing he normally does. And I'm not really sure how I deal with him either at times! I think I'm playing something out with him, like maybe he represents my father?

I know what you mean, too, about how the bubble can be nice but also constricting. If you want to PM me what he sent you, I'd be happy to read it. If you'd rather keep it private, I completely understand that, too.