Quote:
Originally Posted by smileygal
Sorry to hear things are so hard right now LT. He seems to be clumsily barging through a very fragile period of time in the therapy relationship. Honestly I feel like he should have been prepared for this sort of possibility. To act as if your feelings have come out of nowhere and are a shock that he needs to process seems rather amateur and lacking in a lot of skill and knowledge tbh.
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Thanks, Smiley. I appreciate the validation. I mean, I initially consulted with him because of my transference for ex-MC. He heard all about that. I don't really get how he's surprised by this either. I guess he thought by not being all warm and fuzzy, the transference and attachment wouldn't happen. But that's not how transference works. (I mean, the psychoanalytic model is based on the blank-slate therapist, as I understand it. A blank slate on which to project transference.) He even acknowledges that much of this is transference! But then (including today) will also say he feels it's about him specifically (when I say it's not). So I don't know....
I guess on the sort-of plus side, he has reached out to consult with others about this. But he said one T said it seems I'm just trying to sabotage the relationship. And Dr. T seemed to agree with that. So...not sure how that's helpful without exploring the *why* that might be happening. We talked about that briefly I guess. But he didn't seem to get that this is more of a subconscious thing, about trying to get some need met or address something from my past, as opposed to me saying,"OK, then, time to sabotage this relationship!"
Plus, it seemed fine at first! Apparently it's that I keep wanting to talk about it. But I'm trying to examine what it's about. What's behind it. I'm trying to do...therapy.