I used to be very self destructive. My arms and legs are lined with scars. I also purged, no binging, just purging and denial of food. For me the answer was learning acceptance. The ability to sit with myself and be ok with that. Why was I so hateful towards myself, I don’t know. I had all kinds of patience and forgiveness for others but none for myself. Being in my skin was horrible and I was just driven to destroy myself. I don’t have a magic answer to what changed, it was gradual and I learned to sit in the moment with myself without judging myself. I had a lot of therapy and at some point it began to take hold. Sorry I have nothing concrete to offer.