cry if you feel like it, get up and do something, anything that is an ordinary function or activity - it will start to make you feel connected, then do the next thing.

make a list if that will help.

ex.:
shower, shampoo hair
clean up room
put on positive music to fill the air
plan to walk outside, breathe in fresh air, take a jog
take a bike ride
maybe look into part-time job at local coffee-shop, bookstore or something
exercise
eat nutritious meal or make smoothie
for today, no blaming others
re-language inner-talk, to something positive, like, 'i am worthwhile, i deserve to be happy, i am alive, i am getting better, i want to laugh again, i want to be free of sadness' - stuff like that

when we take responsibility for ourselves and our actions, our world changes .... we feel empowered, little by little. we can respect ourselves.

when we respect ourselves, we don't rely on others to supply our happiness, we rely on others to share the happy moments we have.

your girlfriend is an individual and so are you.

by having our well-being within us in decent order, and brushing up on areas we have slacked in, we become more attractive to others around us, and yes, we can be taken more seriously, and gain respect from those around us.

it seems you may have an anxiety issue, which your md can handle, plus if you are stuffing any grief from the loss of a friend, perhaps a counsellor can have a session with you to help you get in touch with where those feelings are now.

you have lots to do, but if you take it one activity at a time, and ask for help where you need it, (maybe with your to-do list you can get help - but ask them to be gentle with you, that you are having anxiety ... and it hurts) ... anyway, you can get where it is you need to be by taking it one step at a time.

welcome to pc.

hope you make lots of friends here.

peace and encouragement to you,
nightbird

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