I went one week without purging. I've been finding it difficult to do so lately (only blood comes up) so have kinda been forced not to. My case worker says I should be proud because I haven't binged and tried every day, but I'm just not feeling it.

It's like I'm not proud of being 50 some odd days clean from substances, but again that feels like it was forced because it's part of my conditional discharge and if I get drug tested and test positive for anything, I'll be forced to go back to the state hospital (which will take at least a month out of my life).

I also feel like it's basic human things to do. Most people don't eat half the house and throw it all up and don't feel the need to feel accomplished to do so. Most people aren't proud that they're not drug addicts because it's not a thing most people go through. If most people can do the basics without feeling accomplished to do so, why should I feel proud?