Dear T,
I'm not totally sure how to feel about that session. We turned it around because I spoke up about feeling judged on my parenting. And you got much more compassionate. You said how you need to push me on things like this. But I think my comment on maybe needing to deal with the emotional component of stuff with D is accurate. You said that you think they don't have to be exclusive, that I can work on both at once. But I'm not sure it entirely works that way for me.

Also, when I said I wasn't sure I felt totally secure on things in the therapy room, I was trying to say I'm not ready for you to be pushing me on topics right now. That Friday felt OK, good even, and things do generally seem OK between us. But I'm not at the point of entirely trusting you right now, or maybe even at like 75% trusting you. I didn't say that in the moment, but maybe I need to on Wednesday. I may still need you to be more gentle for a bit.

I guess when I said before that I wanted to talk about D, I didn't quite mean in this way. It felt like you went into "fix it" mode, when I'm still trying to process everything going on with her right now and how to deal with it emotionally before switching to "How do we fix it?" I guess that's an easier mode for you to be in. But I'm glad you were able to shift to compassion mode. The week before Christmas, which is a stressful time for me, isn't the week to figure out how to solve things with D. Right now, I need to get through.

Love,
LT