Hi Dunnit, I've been burned by a former friend of mine recently and it took far too long for me to process myself out of the hurt and disappointment. My mind and heart had to come to terms with things at their own, different paces.

Choosing a therapist isn't really a gender issue, their job is not to be your new best friend, it's to help you discover the attitudes and systems within that continually steer you into the situation you want to avoid. He/she will not empathize with you, but rather, help you discover the knowledge and personal/emotional tools you need to cope and function within relationships. When you've identified the areas in yourself that can make use of those tools, you will learn how to apply those tools in your daily living. That part is up to you.

A good "fit" will be the therapist who has the training and experience to assist you in that identification process. It's not a lifetime commitment, you may be able to discover your needs and coping skills within a handful of sessions. The application of your new skills is entirely up to you. You CAN do it!