I only mention Ben for reference sake because I'm talking to a new friend Tiago and he's likes to vent to me about himself and because of this experience I'm like **** happens. Or I'm not as sympathetic in messages as I used to be because I'm scared that if I validate him or give him too much sympathy he'll put all his problems on me. I'm just wondering now how I'm ment to put on a boundary because before I even met Ben I didn't even know what an emotional boundary that friendship taught me a lot about emotional boundaries. Coz my emotional boundaries were overstepped many times when he'd tell his mum things I told him not to share with her it used to annoy me that he never understood why I'd find it a problem. Still to this day I just can't put up with people complaining and just feel like pushing them away when they get emotional with me. I think it's me now realizing that before I didn't know where my emotional boundary was but now I know where it is and complaining especially if it's a consistent thing, I think I'm gonna speak up and say I'm not gonna respond to you if you complain which in my eyes I'd think it was cruel but now I realise you have to take care of your mental health. I just get so upset with me because I let that friendship drain me that now like a year on from not talking to Ben I still feel drained thinking about it.