It’s good that you had this conversation. From what you have shared I think your wife has experienced changes that have affected her ability to desire the intimacy the way you want to be intimate. I think part of her challenge is due to her childhood history and how things surfaced in her in having her own children to nurture. It’s a desire to give a child something ones self may not have gotten. I also think your wife’s health challenge with her thyroid has affected her as well because of the function of the thyroid and how that affects someone hormonally.

If you can see this as not personally rejecting you, but more of a change in her then your focus can be on interacting with each other that is healthiest for your two children.

One’s ego and self esteem can fair better when taking the steps to understand the reality of what is taking place then the pursuit of an ideal that simply can’t be and it’s not anyone’s fault or a rejection.

Let’s say it was you that experienced a thyroid problem and it resulted in ED and your losing desire for intimacy. You may still love your wife but can no longer be intimate. You may tell your wife to pursue that else where. It’s more evident when a man experienced challenges then a woman. Yet, it i has nothing to do with rejection. Instead it’s a challenge brought about due to a health challenge. These challenges can come up in a relationship and it can be hard to explain or discuss. Sometimes the person struggling is embarrassed and doesn’t know how to discuss it.

If you can be open and willing to understand, the two of you can work towards being good parents and nurturing you children so they fell safe, wanted and loved.